March came with promises of sunny weather, snow drops and tender feelings. I embrace it as hard as I can, I let it lead the way, stumbling down a couple of times, two steps forward and one step back, then all the way, head first. I feels like falling, but in a good way, probably like parachuting- free fall and yet you know there´s someone there to catch you.;-)
Here´s to us!
Today it´s international Women´s Day and Mother´s Day in Romania, so let´s celebrate ourselves and our sisters, mothers and girlfriends with a better meal, some champagne and flowers!
Carol by Todd Haynes
If you´re not madly in love with Cate Blanchett by now (as yours truly), you will definitely be by the time you´ve finished watching this movie! She´s been my muse for a while now and last time I had a serious crush on her was in Blue Jasmine, when I could have stolen her entire wardrobe! 😉
The picture is a masterpiece, from Carol Aird´s exquisite taste in clothes (and boy did women know how to dress and carry themselves in the 50s!) to the underplayed dialogue and the human frailty encompassing the whole story.
Night time
“You ground your teeth again last night”
You told me
When I woke up in a pool of sweat.
It’s funny to think of how makeup,
Smart dresses and “elevated speech”
Boil down to nakedness
When you sleep.
We’re so exposed, I’m thinking
Biting our lips
And cracking our fingers
Our flesh trembling
With lust,
Our mind ridden with guilt
And our hair
Getting in the way.
But I don’t say a thing,
This too shall pass
One day I’ll be stronger
Than my demons.
March, 2016
Happiness
Happiness is coffee in bed,
A kiss from your samoyed
And the sun winking at you
From the other side of the window.
Happiness is a rainy day
When you can stay tucked away
From the world
And read a love story.
We all seem to have
Our understanding of happines
And yet it eludes us most of the time-
Chasing for dreams
Bigger than we can carry
Or letting ourselves be sucked dry
By the dementors of the past.
Let go of me, darling
Let go of my soul,
Like I let go of yours,
So we can be happy again.
March, 2016
Getting by
Hi, how are y’all? Thank you for hanging in there with me, I´ve been pretty emotional on the blog lately, haven´t I? I can´t wait for the day when I´ll feel up to writing about pretty dresses and pretty shoes again, I tell ya! I´m not there yet, though. 😉 It´s still a bumpy road here, although most days are good now and not the other way around. 
Take myself back
To all of you who meant so little
I wish I could take myself back
And I don’t mean the flesh-
‘Cause flesh is ours to be given-
I mean the soul, its wonder-spark
That burns out
For every heartless kiss.
March 2016
“Martisor”
Today I´ve had a bad day
And I don´t only mean
A bad hair day,
But the kind of day
When your fears
Are palpable,
When all your sadness
Resurfaces from some
God forgotten place
And biblical guilt
Haunts you
Until you want to scream
And say “I give in”!
All this turmoil
Makes me tired,
Makes me want to crawl
Back into my shell
Where it doesn´t matter
If you´re good or bad
`Cause you´re miserable anyways.
But I fight it.
I´ve been so happy
These past few days,
I threw myself at happiness
Like it wasn´t deceitful
Like I believed I could do it.
Nothing´s changed, though
It might be the “MARTISOR”-
The Romanian way
Of celebrating spring,
There´s no sign of spring here, you see-
And my anxiety gets the best of me.
March, 2016
Looking back
My feet are crippled with blisters,
Blisters full of pus
From all the running I’ve done,
The running around in circles
Thinking that it would skrink the distance
Between two bodies so compatible
And yet so lacking in knowledge,
Knowledge about human connection-
And how it doesn’t happen through touch,
However tender or fiery,
But through looking into each other’s soul.
February 2016
Things I like
I made a list of things I like
Like foreign film
Prosecco, dark chocolate
Good books
And good lays.
Things I love though
Are kisses on the forehead
Late night confessions
A good ratatouille
A walk in the forrest
And the cat jumping on the bed
With the menace of a never ending snuggle.
February 2016
life in a bubble 