happiness

Funny How Things Turn out in Life

I’m sorry for my long absence, these days I call it a good one if I get to shower, there’s Madeleine and then there’s everything else. So four months have passed since I last wrote a couple of words and believe me, it’s a wonder I’m writing this entry now. 😉 (If it isn’t dinner, it’s walking Sam, or she wakes up on account of separation anxiety or I’m simply dead and waiting to be buried ;-))

You see, having yearned for a child for all my life, when it finally happened, I should have been in 7th heaven, but the truth is corona monopolized our lives and on top of that I had no idea raising a child would be this hard. Some days I feel I’m just starting to keep afloat, most days I don’t.

But the happiness is real. You do get to wake up to (and in our case with) a funny little creature so happy it’s out of line when the clock shows only 5:30, then you start singing and clapping your hands the minute you’ve put on your socks and from there it can only get better. She gets her milk and I brew my coffee while checking the infection rate in Oslo- haha.

As I was telling you everything is about Madeleine these days. Although she started kindergarten on the 1st of March, it feels like for the better part of the time she’s either been sick or her group/the kindergarten have been closed. So I work if I get the chance and I’m happy if I get to meet up in person, because seeing people is what keeps me sane.

We’ve been cheering for spring for a month now and now she’s there and then she isn’t. How about where you live? Do you get to at least be outside, with all these restrictions? We have, even when it’s been too cold to enjoy it, we’ve bought a coffee and pushed the stroller and tried to keep our chin up.

The vaccination is slow or maybe I’m just too impatient and so we don’t dare to make any plans, either, not even for a weekend a couple of hours away where there’s more life than here. Up until now it was sort of a conscious decision not to go anywhere, but now I feel I’d give my right arm to get a taste of normality just for a day or so.

Otherwise, we’re good. There’s almost nothing left of my life before children and I miss it terribly, but there’s no time to mourn and her being so sweet definitely helps.

I wish you a happy spring, wherever you are!

xxx, Alina

Holiday Mood

Holidays for me are time for soul searching, you have all that time on your hands to just breathe, eat, sleep and read. I seldom stay at home during holidays, mostly because I want to see new places and one can never trust Norwegian summer to be real summer. On second thought, I should definitely do it more. It’s an entirely different pace, there’s no need to discover anything, you can throw in a coffee or a beer with your friends from time to time, or just turn off the phone and doze off on the balcony under a blanket. 😉 Or make some great food when inspiration seizes you, like these eggplant towers with pesto, chevre and ruccola. So good! 😉

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Mornings like these

Mornings like these, when you wake up rested and wonder what time it is, then lie awake in bed and find the pain is gone. I knew it would happen some day, the way love passes, so does hurt, but the realisation is consuming nevertheless, I can live again without guilt or remorse, I can open the windows and breathe in the fresh air without almost feeling it´s a sin to be alive. 13716067_10153738430146711_4621537618287731637_n Continue reading →

Happiness

Poetry eludes me again,

Between sick, busy and in love

There´s little time to ponder.

 

I want to write about good stuff, too

But I don´t know how

It´s like I´m more private with happiness

Than I am with sorrow,

People are usually the other way around.

 

I read somewhere once that happiness

Is boring to write about

Because we´re all happy in the same way

Whereas unhappiness is individual-

That´s where the real beauty lies.

 

I don´t know about you

But I´ll take happy any day

I´ll smile from ear to ear

Just because I can

And if that makes me silly

So be it,

I caught my own eye in a window

The other day:

I haven´t been so beautiful in ages.

 

March 2016

 

Happiness

Happiness is coffee in bed,
A kiss from your samoyed
And the sun winking at you
From the other side of the window.

Happiness is a rainy day
When you can stay tucked away
From the world
And read a love story.

We all seem to have
Our understanding of happines
And yet it eludes us most of the time-
Chasing for dreams
Bigger than we can carry
Or letting ourselves be sucked dry
By the dementors of the past.

Let go of me, darling
Let go of my soul,
Like I let go of yours,
So we can be happy again.

March, 2016

A weekend in Rome

Hand on my heart, this trip was the best holiday I´ve ever had! 😉 It wouldn´t have turned out this great if I´d planned it in detail, in fact, the surprise element is exactly what made it so good. It was all about the senses- good food, good drink, new experiences, furry friends and effortless conversation.

I´ve done so many things for the first time this weekend, you have no idea! 😉 Like riding a motorbike in a guy´s jacket, with a guy´s eye shades, mascara running black down my face and my smile stone-still from the cold, painted red on my face. I´ve “fed” stones to swans, had the best hot chocolate in my entire life in Anguillara, a small town by the coast an hour away from Rome, climbed a “mountain” in high heels and ate proper Italian linguine and clams in a proper Italian home.

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