I started on this entry on Wednesday and called it Hump Day (aka Wednesday, don´t think of silly things, please!), at that time I was frustrated with the world and its lack of courtesy, so I felt grateful to be two days away from the weekend, Prosecco glass in my hand. 🙂 Yesterday however I was in a different state entirely, so I changed the title to Almost Weekend and uploaded these serene pictures to go with it. I didn´t manage to write any text, ´cause my mother called and we talked for ages. Then she passed me Diana, who told me silly little things like “people have to tidy up, you know. hihi!” And I was like “Let me see you when you grow up, how fun you think it is then!” haha! So today I realise it is the Weekend, which reflects in my choice of title. 😉
How should I say I am? Tired, most of all. The burden of independence takes its toll on me and so does the fact that I haven´t sorted out the finances of a broken marriage yet. Plus it hurts to be the object of somebody´s frustration, especially when you have warm feelings for the person.
Further on, I do things differently than most people, be it on account of my longing for openness or my steering away from conflicts or just because I´m not like everybody else. So many tend to be surprised, if not judgemental and I end up feeling bad for good things in my life. And although I usually mean well, I don´t always end up being very considerate.
That being said, I don´t know if this discontent is just a consequence of my situation or if it´s something more. I tend to incline towards the latter since I´ve been quite dissatisfied with my working situation for a while now. Although I make a good living, being an interpreter means absolutely 0 status, lots of unpredictability (big cases get cancelled one day ahead and you don´t know how much they´ll pay you for setting aside several weeks and saying no to other assignments) and generally being taken for granted. Plus the marketing part, I need to sell myself as a brand and I usually do it well, but sometimes I wish I could just say -See if I give a damn, you know? 😉
Otherwise things are good. We´re going to Bucharest in a couple of weeks´time and I can´t wait to see my folks, enjoy the summer and discover new places together. The weather´s been shitty here and I just lost the last rest of my patience with Norway. This morning it snowed just 20 min away from me, while it rained downtown. And then the sun came out, but it was a frosty sun (or a toothy sun, as we say in Romanian ;-)) and still no sign of spring.
It´ll be our 4th trip together and it´s going to be so nice. And although I don´t have a budget for Max Mara this time, I´m going to eat well, drink well and wallow in the people I care for, like a hen in sand. (I just made that up! Does it make any sense?!) haha!
Hoping you´re having better weather and less dark thoughs, but as much love as I have! 😉