Being a Mother

Although she’s had ten days of growth spurt when she woke up every other hour at night for milk and the heat prevented her from sleeping well during the day to the point where I felt I had nothing more to give, I still have to pinch myself every time I see her face- I’m a mother! The thing that others take for granted has been such a lifelong dream for me and what do you know, I’ve got the “café baby” I’ve always wanted! At least for now. What I meant to say is that she’s usually in a good mood and puts up with all my socializing without complaints.

Alina tran-2 12I recall somebody telling me a year ago that having a child makes you stop being the nr. 1 person in your life and I replied “Hell yeah, bring it on”! And it’s lovely, having something bigger than yourself to worry about, someone else’s wellbeing ahead of your own. But I can only appreciate that when she sleeps enough and I get to be myself, at least for an hour. Read the paper, do my nails, bake a cake. How was it for you? The big change? Did you embrace it or did it feel like your whole world was gone?

By now she usually goes to bed at 8 pm and we try to watch a series and eat some ice-cream, often ending up asleep on the couch. But it’s so nice to have a bit of time together, I fight the sleep with all my powers, sometimes I even pull myself up and do stuff around the house, just to be on my own and not squander the time on sleep. Familiar? Haha!

I can’t wait for her to grow up, walk around the house and be pals with Sam, but to tell you the truth, I dread the idea of play dates and playgrounds and all that. As an adult, not only do I find playing a drag, but I never know what to say to kids, either. Haha! Aside from that, I’ve never had problems finding a topic to talk about and my friend Karolina said Madde will probably offer competition! haha! My grandma used to tell me all the time I shouldn’t speak that much, or else I’d turn into a woodpecker! haha! And so once we were on the train and a lady was talking incessantly and I blurted out: You shouldn’t talk that much, if you don’t want to turn into a woodpecker!” haha! That shut her up for a while.

Anyways, nice talking to you again, I’m going back to my coffee and news, before she wakes  up!

xxx, Alina

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